i asked the chattering birds, the swifting clouds, the paling sky, the shadows, the damp air, the dying night "please come with me to bed, let us pause and dream for a while. there is no need to rush into today when we have already had so many days and have so many more days ahead..."
i wanted to reach out and grab everything and hold it and have it. but i soon realized, or more so remembered, there was not a bit of reality in my desires. today had already begun and parts of it were already gone, perhaps lost forever.
this week has sent my head spinning. i can't help but be reminded of life's ability to not only progress and digress down certain pathways very quickly, but also its tendency to hop onto other paths that we have never known before, often leaving us lost and frightened. there is a fragility in everything we are and do that we all tend to ignore, which always flashes before us in the most unexpected moments.
not everything always "works out" and hardly anything we expect to happen ever happens. never are the most horrible things that happen to us fair or anticipated, but we can endure so much more than we can imagine. we can watch a sunrise and a nightfade and remember the most amazing things. we can keep these things with us forever if we want to. we can not ask for the birds to pause in mid-flight, or ask a person to stay in our lives who is leaving or already gone. we can not pause a day or pretend the world stops while we dream. life is always moving, changing, fleeting, revolving. we can move with it and we can be a part of it. as long as we are living we can always smile, breath deep the air, taste the water, and fill our hearts with love.
as my own life advances and changes i can not help but see all of your lives moving so freely beside mine. you amaze me and give me the courage to smile and feel secure in my role as a living breathing loving thing.
i am absolutely sure that all of you know all of this, i just feel they are things that can always use some reiteration.
xo
Sunday, May 30, 2010
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